LeoC: Another chapter of life~

To be frank, not even once have I thought of reviving my blog but today, as I am sitting right now in the campus library and my both feet kissing this ground that feels so farmiliar yet remote to me, I know I'd better put all my thoughts accruing from the past nine days into words for I know not when I would be back to this site again.

There was definitely a drastic leap of my life and my emotion alike when I first stepped out from MAS airplane and walked towards the custom counters: I am now on my own. The feelings were so jumbled up as I couldn't make up whether I was excited or not. Maybe the intermediate between two. The day before I was literally sulking having known that the day that I had been apprehensive of had finally come and yet, all over her weathered face was an expression denoting no emotion at all. Her tone was even flat when she was urging me to dress up and get ready into the car. Yeah, she had had enough. I boarded the plane later shrugging off the weight after talking to her in the phone.

Living on my own was not actually a big deal. I just knew I was not going to be a loner. So, it is to my greatest relief that I have this girl friend staying two units away from where I live. The passion in one fresh relationship might be so strong that it actually makes your first few days in a new living environment heaven; but when the reality sinks in, I have acknowledged the need to sustain it- and yeah, that is when the experiences from the past start to haunt, so much so that I begin to take many initiatives to keep the fire burning on. You might say one-way relationship never works out in the end - for me, I don't give a damn. The resources are mine to give and I am too tired to bother whether others will cherish them or not. Well, I guess most of them go to waste.

Yet, there's this small contradictory voice in me that actually urges me to take chances.
This teensy hope that hopes for the best.
Yeah, that's all I need.